What people say
I can honestly say that, for the first time in 50 years, I’m learning how to just be. How to relish the present moment, which, magically and mysteriously, unlocks the door to the treasure house that is the rest of my life.
- Jennifer Green, Salem, Oregon
From the moment Jon and I connected, I had this deep experience of loving presence and complete trust. Something bypassed my mind and my ability to figure things out, and communicated directly to my heart and soul that I was safe and in the right place. There was a creation of power in our relationship that he honored and witnessed as being mine. It was my power. I had the experience of being wonderfully, beautifully powerful, in the most loving, energized way.
- Laura Lind-Blum, The Idea Midwife, Waterbury Center, Vermont
Jon can help you recognize where you are, and become more clear. My work with him has not been about plotting out my future, it has been about helping me come into deeper relationship with myself so that next steps unfold easily and effortlessly.
He creates a safe, spacious container for you to go as deep or wide or high as you’re capable of in any given moment. It’s a matter of him being able to see the facets and help me make them real in me.
- Sandra Leader, Carmel, CA
My feelings changed from, “Quick, fix me, I can’t stand how I feel, make it better, hurry,” to, it’s not about hurry, and it’s not about fixing, it’s about staying where you are and getting more and more and deeper and deeper sensations that this is okay. You’re fine, this is okay.
It helps me reframe experience. I don’t see anything that’s happening quite the same as I’ve ever seen it before, because my viewpoint has been enlarged. There’s more, there’s peace, there’s joy, there’s love, there’s health, there’s everything.
- Layne Young, artist, Salem, Oregon
Free Article
What Does Your Body Say?
Your body has wisdom to offer, if you listen to it.
As a marathon runner, a hiker, and a bicyclist, I’ve always been interested in pushing my physical limits. And I learned early in my life that identifying the location of thoughts and feelings in the body is a powerful way to experience — instead of just conceptualize — what we feel. As I help my clients learn to hear what their bodies are saying, they discover a rich source of insight for themselves.
Our society emphasizes thinking over feeling, and emotional intelligence over physical understanding. As a result, it seems as if the only times we listen to our bodies at all is when we work out, when something is seriously painful, or perhaps when making love.
But your body is more than just a sometimes-troublesome, sometimes-entertaining transport mechanism for your head. Tuning in to your body’s messages can give you guidance about everything from choices you’re facing to unexpected options you hadn’t noticed were available.
Here are some simple ideas for you to explore in learning to listen to what your body has to say.
Let go of schedules
We’re a schedule-driven society. In order to be at work by eight, you have to be up by six, and gulp down breakfast on your way out the door — or in your car. Lunch is dictated by when your morning meetings end and your afternoon meetings begin. Your workout is sandwiched in there somewhere, someone has to take the kids to soccer practice, and if you don’t fall into bed by midnight you know you’ll pay for it the next day.
As long as you interact with people, you’ll be subject to schedules. But there’s more flexibility in there than you might think. If you listen, really listen, to your body, it will tell you when it wants to get up, when it wants to eat, and when it wants to exert itself. And don’t be surprised when what it tells you varies across the span of your life — and across the span of the year.
Start by listening; then adjust as much as you can, given the constraints you face. Your sense of energy and well-being will be your reward.
Allow
One client surprised herself by listening to her body — and taking her laptop out of what she’d thought was the comfort of her office. Sitting in the window seat with the hot weight of the computer on her lap, typing in its cramped space instead of on her ergonomic keyboard, she found herself surprisingly productive.
It was exactly what she’d needed; she returned to her office several hours later, happy to have overcome the creative stuck spot she’d been struggling with. And she has a new appreciation of what “comfort” really means, and how simply changing her physical perspective can have a profound impact on her thoughts and her creativity.
It’s easy to discount the messages of your body when they’re not what you expect them to be. Instead, allow yourself to hear and respond. You too may be surprised by what happens.
Move — and be still
Your body is the result of evolution through thousands of years of extremely active life. Even in the relatively recent industrial age, people were far more active than they are today.
Heed your body’s impulse to move. Get out from behind your computer, even if only for a brisk walk through the halls of your office. It’s not just a question of exercise. Deeper breathing, blood flowing, it all brings more oxygen to every part of you, including your brain. And that helps you find clarity, grounds excess nervous energy, and allows you to think, speak, create, and communicate more intelligently and with more heart.
On the flip side, also notice your body’s desire for stillness. Fifteen minutes in savasana meditation (flat on your back) might be even more rejuvenating than that walk. And either will serve you better than the cup of coffee or soda you normally reach for.
Feel
Fully feeling your emotions means allowing yourself to experience them physically. Every thought and every emotion finds its place in your body, whether you’re conscious of it or not. Noticing where and how your feelings show up physically will help you become more clear about what’s happening for you.
And when you’re more aware of what’s happening, you’re more able to release powerful emotions before they sneak up on you and cause confrontation, argument, and conflict.
Stop
You’re a busy person, living a fast-paced life. It takes commitment and focus to listen to your body — especially since you’re probably not used to hearing what it has to say.
Create a habit of stopping to listen closely. What impulse do you feel inside you? Is there an urge to move — or to sit quietly? Is there a knot of emotion somewhere that’s asking you to explore it?
When you listen to your body, you’ll hear valuable messages. You might become aware of incipient injuries from working out or from too much sitting in one position. You could discover that the frustration you’ve felt at work is less overwhelming than you thought — or that finding a new job is more urgent than you’d realized. You might find — as one client did — that you've been eating out of habit or for comfort, creating discomfort in your body (along with extra weight!).
As you respond to these messages, your relationship with yourself will improve. You may lose weight; you may create a deeper connection with the people you love; and you may even find yourself communicating better with your co-workers.
And as you re-inhabit your body, you’ll move into a fuller experience of who you are and what it means to be.
Life doesn’t happen just from the neck up!
“Our own physical body possesses a wisdom which we who inhabit the body lack.” Henry Miller, 1891-1980, American novelist and painter.
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